Congestion Depression is in My Brain Blues

By Roger Paradiso

Congestion is the state of overcrowding. Congestion pricing is a way to discourage congestion through a tax. This is a quagmire. Over 70 percent of residents are against it. Yet, many cities like London and Singapore have used it to some success.

Somewhere around 1626

The Dutch fleeced the Lenape natives for Manhattan. But the Lenapes left us an intricate network of paths that covered a large part of the clean, natural island. The Dutch began to congest and ingest the great island and it’s been all downhill since.

The Brits and the Americans continued the destruction. You had horses and humans defecating on the land. No matter how many roads they built, there was congestion. No matter how many bridges, tunnels, trains, subways and aero planes they built, there was still congestion. Let’s face it, humans cause congestion. And politicians will allow it as long as they can tax it.

Why? Well, they like the congestion, within reason, because it brings tourists and workers and residents who consume and spend their way through life. And governments love to tax and spend on repairing the damage. It creates jobs.

Right now, I have the Congestion Blues. We have hit the fan with fumes and congestion. What do we do? Give them what they want — no cars. No cars in Manhattan? How you gonna do that? We gotta.

We’ve run out of space to put crap. You got people and cars and bikes everywhere. They congest the space. They congest the air. They congest the lungs of every living thing on this island.

Here’s a plan and I know nothing of civil governments and planning. But I do know it ain’t working now. Robert Moses couldn’t lead us out of this dumpster fire. In fact, he helped create it.

 

Somewhere in the 1990s

Waves of native and foreign traffic experts were brought in and this is what they have done. (See picture, above.)

On a typical Manhattan street, there are usually around four lanes of crosstown traffic and six or more on the Avenues running North and South. They have cut the lanes for traffic to one lane on crosstown streets and three lanes on the North South avenues. In its place, on crosstown streets, they have put one curb lane to park cars, one lane for cars, trucks and cabs, and a lane for bikes and skateboards. And, there’s more traffic on the Avenues. They have the bike lanes, truck lanes and weird lanes for parking. And of course, there are cabs and Ubers playing demolition derby with the awkward double buses. And there are bikers and motor bikers and jaywalkers. And they wonder why there is so much congestion. It’s nuts. And the taxes went up.

So, they already have built the EZ Pass monitors to the tune of billions of dollars. You think they won’t use it? Yes, they will. They want your cars and trucks out of Manhattan, specifically at this point in time, from 57th Street down to the Battery,

 

There’s a solution to everything?

In a quagmire you come up with ideas that may or may not work—or may make things worse. Why? Perhaps there is no solution. There must be a solution. How about these?

• Clean energy Light Rail to every feasible Avenue. No charge to users. Sell ads on the trains.

• Clean energy Monorails with elevator stations in a circular pattern around Manhattan perimeters. No charge. Sell ads on the monorails.

• Clean energy 20-seat Trolley Buses picking up people at every bus stop. No charge. Sell ads on the trolleys

• Bikes lanes—allow one close to the one curb. Create walking malls.

• Create more subsidized housing for seniors, artists and people under 30 — providing they don’t have a car. They pay 30 percent of their earnings as rent.

• No more office buildings or condos unless they build a green park with trees. They must pay into upkeep of the park and nonpolluting transits systems that aren’t cars.

• Pay the truckers double their salary for delivering between 7 pm and 12 midnight. No truck deliveries during the day in the zones between 57 Street to the Battery.

• Flexible office hours and working week. More at home work hours.

And now my brain is tired. I tried. Next time…Subways!

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Roger Paradiso has been a journalist and filmmaker for many years. His films include the award-winning The Lost Village.